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The Conversation: EmpowHER© To Use Their Voice.

I am wanting, willing and empowered to enter into the dialogue women are facing all over the world regarding sexual abuse, sexual trauma, sexual assault and sexual harassment. There is zero tolerance.

Today at this present moment lets bring our attention to the individuals who have been so courageous to share their power and story. Accepting reality that most of us have tasted abuse in some form or another is one thing, but it is an entirely different conversation to begin to learn how to cope, come to terms with the lasting impact, and explore the healing that is necessary to become whole again.

Many questions can start to arise with all the media attention and stories inundating us as we try to make it through our daily life. Memories can even start to come out of nowhere.

Am I safe to share this?

Did this really happen to me?

What do I do with it now?


How do I survive?

These questions are just a fragment of the internal dialogue you may be having at any given moment. But what I need to make resoundingly clear to you is that you are empowHER-ed to say, believe and ask for anything you understand as YOUR TRUTH. Your truth is your truth and no one can take this away from you.

How Do We Take Care of Ourselves?

What do we do to make our lives safe? We start with reminding ourselves what is our truth. The imprinted experiences will not go away and it was not your fault. I have felt deeply moved, even awed, by the impressive power and courage of the human spirit when it comes to sharing one’s story.

Start the process of taking care of your needs by deepening your EMPOWERMENT. I have created EmpowHER©, a women’s group where we talk about the following subjects.

  • Reclaim what is yours

  • Find a safe place that you are in control of

  • Remind yourself of your higher power

  • Contemplate your readiness to work with a professional

Reclaiming What Is Yours: Creating Boundaries.

The most basic and fundamental internal need is to remind oneself that this is mine and that is yours. When it comes to any violation of space, the lines are blurred and disrespected. Finding your boundaries will help the beginning of the healing journey individually and as a society from these issues of violation. Starting to create boundaries will help you learn to identify what is yours.

  • Understanding what is your comfort zone

  • What are your core values

  • Let your behaviors, and your words speak for yourself.

  • Remember what your boundaries being crossed looks like

Building A Safe Environment: Creating Your Sanctuary

It’s not only important to recognize your mindset and boundaries, it’s also very important to create a safe environment. This is an environment that you are in control of, feel comfortable in, and are able to share your expectations regarding your boundaries. The need for safety and how important it is to live without the feeling of fear is a fundamental way to create an internal and an external sanctuary.

Every hour by the hour, moment by the moment, day by day it is encouraged to develop a consist awareness of your internal and external safety. And don’t forget to create your consistent sanctuary both at your home and when you are away.

  • Identifying with your intuition. Following your gut

  • Going where you want to go, when you want to go.

Reconnecting To Your Higher Power: Finding Peace With Your Power

In moments of trauma and uncertainty one’s higher power brings peace and comfort. It can helpy you create a deep meaning in your healing. Two ways to reconnect to your higher power are silence and surrendering. Breathing, prayer, and meditating are fantastic ways to surrender and identify your place in this universe.

Are You Ready To Talk About It? Using Your Voice

Finding the appropriate person and therapeutic alliance to support you is one of the greatest ways to reconfirm your power. By EmpowHER –ing yourself to engage in talking about these experiences either in individual or group settings you are on the road to reconfirming your truth is your truth.

Your voice is heard, be gentle with yourself.

Dr. Ryan Westrum is a sex therapist that works with supporting people healing from sexual abuse, sexual trauma and unwanted sexual advances. He offers both individual support and group led counseling. You may contact him at or calling him at 952-261-5269 to learn more about the services Healing Souls offers.

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