Really It's This Simple
I'm going to share all my cards... It’s all about Love. The moment I heard The Beatles sing All You Need Is Love. It was it, nothing more, nothing less. Oh and in my classic digression I could also say that about My Sweet Lord by the late George Harrison. However, for both your sake and mine I am going to go back to expressing my admiration for love; specifically, self love. And I promise not to go into a dissertation of the music that has influenced my life.
To iterate on the thought of Love, I think we need to look at acceptance and what you want to trust in which is one word… LOVE. Ok I know confusing right? No, actually start with a heart of acceptance then LOVE
can shine. Everyone from the day you take your first breath to the day you take your last breath talks about all you need is love; and so what about the practice of love and self-love.
First, don’t condemn yourself. You have been condemned so much, and often you have accepted all the condemnation. Then you go on doing small and large versions of harm to yourself.
I have heard, seen and glimpsed into the abyss of self-annihilating behavior for along time – suicidal ideation or depression – and what I have continued to learn and understand with a deeper sense of appreciation is that one of the largest antidotes in becoming loving to yourself is being gentle with yourself. You can become part of the whole only if you have a great respect for yourself and your “Source” that resides in you. By inviting in loving yourself with gentleness you will know this: that you have time and the opportunity to be a vehicle of love.
Secondly, create loving energy around yourself. Love your body, love your emotional heart, and love your thoughts and mind. Love your whole instrument, your whole organism. By “love” I mean, listen to it, and accept it as it is. Don’t try to suppress. We suppress only when we are against something. Because, if you suppress, how are you going to listen to it, or watch it? If you are not a lover of yourself you will not be able to look into your own eye, into your own face, let alone into anyone else’s face either. Check into your own energy and give it out.
Lastly, it’s ok to be selfish. If you are not selfish you will not be self-sacrificing, remember. If you don’t put the oxygen mask on yourself first… Um it’s trouble?? If you are not selfish you will not be unselfish, remember. Only a very deeply selfish person can be unselfish in their giving and presence with others. But this has to be looked at with a little deeper perspective. It’s paradoxical I know.
The meaning of being selfish can basically mean self-centered. The other meaning can be seen as one’s peace and energy field being protected. If you are self-centered you are selfish in whatever you do. You may do something, or give something in hopes that the other person not only will recognize you, but also shower you with admiration and acknowledgement – which totally defeats why you are doing it. Alternatively, being selfish is in a way rooted in oneself and deeply down into your existence.
Teaching Love is not hard. It is simply done with action. Love is the only freedom from attachment. When you love everything you are attached to nothing.
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Dr. Ryan Westrum is a clinical psychologist, licensed therapist and devoted to letting love lead. Please check out the latest podcast at The Psychedelic Psychologist or go to his website to read the latest tangent he is reflecting on.
