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Mindful Moments

Stress and Sex: Mindful Moments

Is it truly the most wonderful time of year? It’s getting darker earlier, we’re exposed to less sun, and the decreased temperatures can make it more difficult to choose to be outside. If we celebrate the holidays, that can mean spending money in ways our bank accounts weren’t ready for, yet. There seems to be more hustle and bustle as the year comes to an end and everyone is in a rush to meet work and personal obligations.

With increased commitments often comes increased stress. Increased stress in our lives can also mean our sex lives takes a back seat or it becomes forced. Stress can negatively impact our body image, mess with our desire and arousal, put strain on our relationships, lead to easy ways of coping that negatively impact our health (such as heavy smoking or drinking), and impact our hormone levels. It is important to identify the stressors in our lives and communicate them to our partners and family. By releasing this stress through verbalizing it to our partners it will give more space to be relaxed for connecting and exploring our sexual desires.

Although it may seem like one more thing to add to the list, taking care of ourselves during this time of year (and actually year-round) is extremely important. Taking care of ourselves can look like many different things – from getting a massage, a hour at the yoga studio, to doing any form of art, getting together with our closest friends, meeting with our therapists more frequently, taking a moment away from the party to take a few deep breaths, sneaking away for a kiss (or more). Taking a few mindful moments out of your day can keep some of the passion in your life and make this time of year truly wonderful and sexy! Find a mindful moment with your partner in the morning, at night or in the middle of all the stress Enjoy the holiday season!

Ryan is the creator of Healing Souls a private practice focusing on families, and individuals and a sex therapist in the Minneapolis area, contact him at or at or 952.261.5269.

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